Docklands, Melbourne – At 12:13pm last Tuesday, it was Rosalind Taylor’s turn in line to use the only working microwave in her company’s office.
Taylor, a battle hardened and widely feared Finance Executive, placed her leftovers in the microwave and timed it for two minutes. She then immediately made her way to the women’s toilets, much to the displeasure of the six people waiting in line behind her.
“It’s okay” said Samuel Ajani, holding his leftover pizza from the weekend. “she knows she’s on the clock, a two minute in-and-out bathroom mish is completely possible”.
By 12:19pm, Taylor had yet to return. The newly formed Microwave Union started arguing about who will be the one to take her leftovers out of the microwave.
“Oh man this is total BS” said Ajani, whose optimism had quickly faded. “Microwaves are meant for everyone. Not just the oppressive 1% who go missing on the way to the bathroom”.
“Comrades, we will TAKE this microwave AND this company for ourselves. THIS IS OUR REVOLUTION!”
“Down with the oppressors!” They chanted. “Down with the oppressors! Down with the oppressors!”
“…Shhh… shhh guys… she’s coming back!”
Taylor promptly apologised to the Microwave Union and explained that she bumped into the CEO for a chat.
“Oh no, no that’s okay – all good, all good. We didn’t even realise two minutes had passed! Haha… Ha.”
Taylor then took out her food, which was only lukewarm… so she put it back in and nuked it for another five minutes.
At press time, Ajani was disappointed in the Microwave Union’s lack of follow-through with their revolution. “We over-promised and under-delivered, which goes against our company’s values of Integrity and Excellence.”
