Docklands, Melbourne – In an unprecedented world first for the analytics community, a local Melbourne bank has hired its first ever female who isn’t Chinese or Indian.
Recently graduated Sarah Turner, applied for the role and passed all of the technical and behavioural questions with flying colours.
“I don’t know what just happened” Said Turner’s new manager, Jimmy Xu. “Granted, her credentials looked good on paper, but when she rocked up to the interview, she was one of them white folks we’ve heard so much about”
“Not that there’s anything wrong with that” Said Prenesh Singh, a colleague of Turner’s “It’s just that we have never seen anything like this before”
Turner is now working in the company’s data science division, doing all sorts of nerdy shit like coding in Python, R and getting thoroughly lost in GitHub.
Turner is struggling to come to terms with her new celebrity status around the office “Honestly, I don’t see what all the fuss is about, I love maths and statistics – so do my parents and so do all of my siblings” She said.
When Figjam Express followed up a few weeks later to see how Turner was getting along, Xu was even more impressed than he had previously been.
“Sarah has been doing excellent work so far” Xu said. “And what’s even crazier is that she can speak mandarin to her colleagues”
In a shocking twist of events, it turns out that Turner was adopted at birth and raised by a fiercely competitive Chinese couple from Balwyn. Which just goes to show, white chicks can do data, you just need a tiger mum to show you the way.
